We are the emptiness at the centre of the universe holding all together giving witness to its self-disclosure. We were created so that the universe could know itself. Man is the answer to the universe’s “Why?” We reach from the beginning and the end of time to the God that created us in his own image. We are part of that vibration at the centre of the smallest particle of existence and part of the great bang of the WORD that created all.

How are we different from the animals of the fields and the birds of the air? We were created in God’s image to know all, to be all. Man knows himself and is one with God. We have all; we ask nothing. We must die before we die. Death comes as a confirmation of life. We die to know beyond a shadow of a doubt how to find God and our beloved within us. The inevitable conclusion is that death can’t be the end. After death we live hidden within Christ and our beloved. I am within her, she is within me. My soul to her soul; Her soul to my soul; we are one. On the grief journey, every so often you completely let go and your beloved comes to meet you as Christ came to meet Mary Magdalene outside the tomb. Your heart opens, and you realize you have found God and Us! Christ is in us and we are in Him.

Nothing exists without something being aware of it. “I am” is all important. It is what God calls Himself. It is His name. I am because I am aware of myself. The universe exists because we are aware of it. It is God being aware of himself. Patricia lives because both she and I are aware of her. And most importantly God is aware of both of us.

Christ’s Body
By Simeon the New Theologian 
(in Cynthia Bourgeault’s The Wisdom Jesus page 135)

We awaken in Christ’s body
as Christ awakens our bodies,
and my poor hand is Christ. He enters
my foot and is infinitely me.

I move my hand, and wonderfully
my hand becomes Christ, becomes all of Him
(for God is indivisibly
Whole, seamless in his Godhood).

I move my foot, and at once
He appears in a flash of lightning.
Do my words seem blasphemous – Then
Open your heart to Him

And let yourself receive the one 
Who is opening to you so deeply.
For if we genuinely love Him,
We wake up inside Christ’s body

Where all our body, all over, 
Every most hidden part of it,
Is realized in joy as Him.
And he makes us utterly real.

And everything that is hurt, everything
That seems to us dark, harsh, shameful,
maimed, ugly, irreparably
damaged, is in him transformed

and recognized as whole, lovely 
radiant in his light.
We awaken as the Beloved 
In every last part of our body.

So almost two years after my beloved Patricia’s death on January 7, 2017 this is where my grief journey has led me.