Danced with departed spouse…


Woke up just before 5 am for the usual reason. Got back in bed and couldn’t get back to sleep. So, I lay on my back and found a comfortable position with no stress or tension in my body. Emptied my mind so my mind’s eye was seeing only black darkness. Breathed in and out just feeling the movement of my in and out breaths. And repeated in my mind “May Pat every more dwell in me and I in her.” The house was quiet except for the clock ticking and chiming the half hours and hours. A great calm came over me. Then the blackness changed to a light sky blue colour with powder white stylized birds – just like Pat’s favourite jersey. It pulsed in time to my breathing. Shortened the manta to just her name, Pat. A new pulsating colour appeared – a light yellow green moving through the powdery blue like the oil in those old Lava lights pulsed through the water. Blue and yellow forever individual but occupying the same space. I began to think I felt Pat’s presence – that the light blue was her and the light oily yellow-green was me. I was at peace and felt rested. When I heard, the paper being put in my mail box I decided to get up. It was after 7 am. Okay this proves nothing except that I can meditate. However, I believe it was Pat and I; we were doing a marriage dance: you know that feeling, you are dancing inside and have an eternal connection to your loved one and all we have to do is think of them, pray with them to Christ, love them, meditate, live, breathe them in, and they are there again. Love is stronger than Death and Pat and I love each other forever!

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About thebows99krug

Hi, I am Eric, a retired librarian. I was born in St. Michael's Hospital, Toronto and raised in the downtown area north of the Art Gallery, south of the University of Toronto. I went to Orde Street Public School, Harbord C.I., University College at the UofT and the UofT's Faculty of Library and Information Science. I meet my wife Patricia at FLIS; our first date was on November 15, 1968. We were engaged February 14, 1969 and married on June 21, 1969. Our family includes son, James; daughter-in-law, Erin; (both writers), grand-daughters, Vivian and Eleanor; and Pooka, a small but fierce gray tabby. I would like to hear from any other class of '63 alumni of Harbord C.I. and class of '67 alumni of UofT's University College.
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