“O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?” [1 Corinthians 15:55]


Sometimes when searching deep within myself I feel that there is nothing there but the void. That is not so strange as we, mankind, were created out of the void as was time and space. We are as men part of time and space, part of our mother and farther, part of every human being back to Adam and Eve. As Patricia said ” yet beneath, the grass and stone / intertwined their roots have grown, / so intimately webbed together. / neither one can tell his own.” We are intertwined with every other created being. We live in time and space, we are part of history. As part of time and space it is difficult to see anything else. We are too self centred, taken up with exploiting every one and thing that isn’t us! As C.S. Lewis says [Mere Christianity] we are self-centred, “wanting to be patted and admired, to take advantage of other life, to exploit the whole universe,” true capitalists. We don’t want there to be something better than us, that created us, who is the Great Creator outside of time and space, that made us and governs time and space. But we are really individuals, we are connected to every every human being that ever has been, is or shall be, one huge ocean of humanity, part of that void I feel within me. The death of a beloved is painful because we loved her both as an individual and part of our individual life within time and space. We forever reach for her just beyond our self and yes within, knowing she is there. It is hard to grasp that she has moved outside time and space to become one with God. But she was/is one with me you tell yourself and I want her back! We were after all made for each other and were joined in marriage by God as one forever.

That is after all the point. If we examine love and what makes us different from those other created things we find we love and it is love that frees us from death. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”[John 3:16] By that LOVE the Creator became part of his creation. Now we are more than a created being because the Creator, the begotten not made, became part of humanity, forever through Christ. Now humanity is no longer separated from God; God and man are connected through the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. I am one with my beloved Patricia and with God forever. What a comfort in my bereavement. Yes both made and begotten, Christ made it so – it is why he had to die. We, humanity, in C.S. Lewis’ words [Mere Christianity] “passing over from a created thing into a begotten thing, passing over from the temporary biological life into the timeless ‘spiritual’ life…” T.S. Eliot was wrong when he wrote ““This is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper.” Life doesn’t end with either a bang or a whimper, Life and Love don’t end at all! We return to God who art in Heaven as Christ did. Some where when feeling deep within myself I find not the void but my beloved and God. Some day like Christ, Patricia and I will be together one with God the Father. “For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; and whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we are the Lord’s. For to this end Christ both died, and rose, and revived, that he might be Lord both of the dead and living.” Romans 14:8-9

About thebows99krug

Hi, I am Eric, a retired librarian. I was born in St. Michael's Hospital, Toronto and raised in the downtown area north of the Art Gallery, south of the University of Toronto. I went to Orde Street Public School, Harbord C.I., University College at the UofT and the UofT's Faculty of Library and Information Science. I meet my wife Patricia at FLIS; our first date was on November 15, 1968. We were engaged February 14, 1969 and married on June 21, 1969. Our family includes son, James; daughter-in-law, Erin; (both writers), grand-daughters, Vivian and Eleanor; and Sonic, a very friendly ginger tabby. My beloved wife died January 7, 2017 and our 19 year old cat Pooka died January 8, 2017. I would like to hear from any other class of '63 alumni of Harbord C.I. and class of '67 alumni of UofT's University College.
This entry was posted in Bow, Patricia A., Family, Grief, heaven, Love, Marriage, Poetry, Religion, Religion - Anglican, Soulmates. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to “O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?” [1 Corinthians 15:55]

  1. Julia allman says:

    I am so sorry for your loss and thankful that you have shared your beautiful, redeeming perspective on the void you feel.
    God Bless you<3

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